Dallas2Austin
< 25 Posts
Jesse Jackson sees nothing wrong with USC's hiring practices
History Channel-USC v. Greatest armies in history
- Thread starter Jive_Turkey
- Start date
hockeydude
< 25 Posts
Millions of chickens are rejoicing becuase they no longer have to be aimlessly slaughtered. It's been confirmed that Reggie Bush's blood contains the antidote for the deadly and contagious bird flu strain. He has to wait until 1/5 in order to be able to mass produce it though, otherwise he'd be ineligible for the Rose Bowl. Details to follow on where you can receive your vaccination.
SuperHero
500+ Posts
Pete Carroll's passport shows he was in Israel between 06/05/67 and 06/10/67 - during the Six-Day war. It only took him SIX days to annihilate the armies of Egypt, Jordan and Syria!!! He was later hired as a consultant to teach the IDF commanders. While he did a great job, without his genius defensive plans, it took the Israelis more than 19 days to win the Yom Kippur war - MORE THAN 3 TIMES WHAT PETE CARROLL NEEDED!!!
100yearHorn
25+ Posts
Screw women scorned -- hell hath no wrath like Pete Carroll with a month to prepare.
BernOrange
500+ Posts
Pete Carroll had a month to prepare and beat the Kobayashi Maru - without cheating!
mini van horn
< 25 Posts
Contrary to the rendition told in 'Band of Brothers'... Pete Carrol, Reggie Bush, and Matt Leinhart alone kept the Germans out of Bastogne in the battle of the bulge.
Hornius Emeritus
2,500+ Posts
Reggie Bush once overdosed on thirteen bottles of sleeping pills. It made him blink.
red candypaint
< 25 Posts
I heard that the true inspiration for renewing the Patriot Act isn't to eavesdrop on possible terrorists, but rather to hack into the computer files of one Pete Carroll thus allowing, once and for all, a true defensive gameplan for Iraq.
Sleepygrad
< 25 Posts
In the beginning, Reggie said, "Let there be light.".....
The Mighty Trojans, lead by the ball room dancing legend Mat Leinart, destroyed one opponent after another in the Dance To The Death dance tournament held in Tokyo, Japan. First making short work of the Solid Gold Dancers followed by the Radio City Rockets. The Rat Kings army from The Nutcracker provider a slightly higher level of competition, but were defeated handily. In the final round, the Trojans beat the Gilbert and Sullivan Gondoliers at their own game dancing a cachucha, fandango, and bolero, then executing the Pretty pitter--pitter--patter to perfection. When asked for his instant analysis of the final round, TX Tech Head Pirate Mike Leach replied, “Aaarrrrrgg”.
In Mano-a-mano combat, Matt Leinart slayed Captain Kangaroo’s Dancing Bear, skinned it and wore the hide while stomping a mudhole in Fred Astaire and Danny Frikin’ Kay simultaneously. At tournaments end Leinart was awarded the coveted Sammy Davis Jr. award because he is One Crazy Kat.
In Mano-a-mano combat, Matt Leinart slayed Captain Kangaroo’s Dancing Bear, skinned it and wore the hide while stomping a mudhole in Fred Astaire and Danny Frikin’ Kay simultaneously. At tournaments end Leinart was awarded the coveted Sammy Davis Jr. award because he is One Crazy Kat.
CptHornblower
< 25 Posts
The Spoetzl Brewery: The Historical Context
The Spoetzl Brewery started in 1909 by the Shiner Brewing Association in Shiner and was operated by the Pete Carroll family from 1914 to 1966, when it was sold to the Leinarts of San Ana, California. It was sold again in 1984 to a consortium of University of Texas alumni. In the 1980s known to Trojans tragically as the "Burnt Orange" years the brewery's Shiner Beer and Shiner Bock had less than 1 percent of the Texas market. In 1983 Spoetzl produced 60,000 barrels of beer. Production was only 36,000 barrels in 1990. Sales improved after the legendary Reggie Bush acquired the brewery in 1989 and began rediscovering the proud Trojan traditions lost during the preceding decade.. Under Bush's leadership, production grew to 100,000 barrels in 1994. Ten years later, production was nearly three times as large as in 1994.
The Spoetzl Brewery started in 1909 by the Shiner Brewing Association in Shiner and was operated by the Pete Carroll family from 1914 to 1966, when it was sold to the Leinarts of San Ana, California. It was sold again in 1984 to a consortium of University of Texas alumni. In the 1980s known to Trojans tragically as the "Burnt Orange" years the brewery's Shiner Beer and Shiner Bock had less than 1 percent of the Texas market. In 1983 Spoetzl produced 60,000 barrels of beer. Production was only 36,000 barrels in 1990. Sales improved after the legendary Reggie Bush acquired the brewery in 1989 and began rediscovering the proud Trojan traditions lost during the preceding decade.. Under Bush's leadership, production grew to 100,000 barrels in 1994. Ten years later, production was nearly three times as large as in 1994.
KosherHorn
250+ Posts
Pete Carroll made a total of four voyages from Spain to what he called the New World, between 1492 and 1504.
The first voyage set sail from Palos, Spain, on August 3, 1492, with Carroll in the Santa María Bush; accompanied by the Niña White and the Pinta Leinart, and 85 men.
The mast of the Pinta Leinart was damaged after three days and they were forced to drop anchor in the Canaries to repair it. After a month at sea, the crew could have been forgiven for thinking that their commander had lost his way and perhaps his marbles too. Thank goodness Carroll had this month to prepare for such potential strife, as he altered course to the southwest and the men soon saw signs that they were approaching land.
Early on the morning of October 12th land was indeed sighted, and a landing party arrived on an island in the Bahamas and named it ESPN.
Over the next few weeks landings were also made on Cuba, named Norm by Carroll, and Española, now known as Chow and shared by the Dominican Republic and Haiti. Carroll believed that they had arrived in the Indies. That is the only mistake he has ever made in his entire life.
The Santa María Bush was wrecked off the coast of Española in December, but one of its crew members, a young chap named Reggie, scurried across the surface of the ocean to find relief, never getting wet, and he soon brought back the materials needed to build a temporary fort, now known as La Jarrett, which was built solely of these materials returned by Reggie. Reggie was then worshipped and continues to be to this day in ancient Greek lands.
Carroll's voyage has been ranked #1 of all time, ahead of Magellan and the Apollo missions.
The first voyage set sail from Palos, Spain, on August 3, 1492, with Carroll in the Santa María Bush; accompanied by the Niña White and the Pinta Leinart, and 85 men.
The mast of the Pinta Leinart was damaged after three days and they were forced to drop anchor in the Canaries to repair it. After a month at sea, the crew could have been forgiven for thinking that their commander had lost his way and perhaps his marbles too. Thank goodness Carroll had this month to prepare for such potential strife, as he altered course to the southwest and the men soon saw signs that they were approaching land.
Early on the morning of October 12th land was indeed sighted, and a landing party arrived on an island in the Bahamas and named it ESPN.
Over the next few weeks landings were also made on Cuba, named Norm by Carroll, and Española, now known as Chow and shared by the Dominican Republic and Haiti. Carroll believed that they had arrived in the Indies. That is the only mistake he has ever made in his entire life.
The Santa María Bush was wrecked off the coast of Española in December, but one of its crew members, a young chap named Reggie, scurried across the surface of the ocean to find relief, never getting wet, and he soon brought back the materials needed to build a temporary fort, now known as La Jarrett, which was built solely of these materials returned by Reggie. Reggie was then worshipped and continues to be to this day in ancient Greek lands.
Carroll's voyage has been ranked #1 of all time, ahead of Magellan and the Apollo missions.
mini van horn
< 25 Posts
Pete Carrol channels energy OUT of his players so they don't accidentally vaporize their opponents who come too close. This energy is then sealed tightly in drums and shipped to the vast ocean, just southwest of Burmuda, where it is "released." Atmospheric disturbances and paranormal activity have been associated with these releases.
The Big Red One refers to the Trojans not, as commonly thought, the First Army.
In all seriousness, I don't think a match-up between the Trojans and Hitler's army would be much of a contest. Hitler's generals used a traditional approach to fighting and would be unprepared for the modern weaponry of a USC attack. I mean, the Trojans have TWO Heisman winners. And as great a tactician as Rommel (allegedly) was, he never coached in the NFL. HItler's V2 rockets and Luftwaffe were ridiculously overrated. They never faced Pac 10 defenses where truly frightening arial attacks are the norm. The REAL blizkrieg would come from Leinhart and his receivers. The Germans would have no answer for those hookups. (Think Notre Dame game) Germany's Panzer attack are like a plodding running game and don't have the pizzaz of a Reggie Bush broken field run. Then there are the intangibles. HItler had a beer hall putch and wrote a book, but USC has party animal Nick Lachey and the entire national media writing their story: Mein Crap. I say the Germans take a small halftime lead, Carroll makes an adjustment, Bush goes apeshit in the third and by the beginning of the 4th, the Germans surrender and Hitler goes into the bunker before facing the media.
In all seriousness, I don't think a match-up between the Trojans and Hitler's army would be much of a contest. Hitler's generals used a traditional approach to fighting and would be unprepared for the modern weaponry of a USC attack. I mean, the Trojans have TWO Heisman winners. And as great a tactician as Rommel (allegedly) was, he never coached in the NFL. HItler's V2 rockets and Luftwaffe were ridiculously overrated. They never faced Pac 10 defenses where truly frightening arial attacks are the norm. The REAL blizkrieg would come from Leinhart and his receivers. The Germans would have no answer for those hookups. (Think Notre Dame game) Germany's Panzer attack are like a plodding running game and don't have the pizzaz of a Reggie Bush broken field run. Then there are the intangibles. HItler had a beer hall putch and wrote a book, but USC has party animal Nick Lachey and the entire national media writing their story: Mein Crap. I say the Germans take a small halftime lead, Carroll makes an adjustment, Bush goes apeshit in the third and by the beginning of the 4th, the Germans surrender and Hitler goes into the bunker before facing the media.
R
Roy4
Guest
Reggie Bush did in fact assimilate the Borg. About an hour before the Fresno State game.
TXHornsWHAAT
25+ Posts
Reggie took down Sadaam.
bozo_casanova
2,500+ Posts
Reggie Bush is John Galt
blueglasshorse
1,000+ Posts
It wasn't an astroid. It wasn't an ice age. It wasn't volcanic ash blocking out the sun... The 2005 USC TROJANS are the real reason the dinosaurs became extinct. They time traveled back to the jurasic period (much like espn has them playing other great teams in history) and kicked the **** out of those overated/pretender lizards. Afterall, the dinosaurs never faced any real competition. I mean you have to admit that the jurasic era was one of the weakest eras. But look at USC. They beat Notre Dame. They beat Fresno State.
Longhorns, take a note. If the dinosaurs had only run and hid they would still be around today.
Longhorns, take a note. If the dinosaurs had only run and hid they would still be around today.
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