That Wacky RC

Slocum gave quite an oration,
Damn near a standing ovation.
Then RC told the recruits
"You'll look great in brown boots!"
Which caused 'em to flee College Station.
The ag tried his best girl to please,
Later related "She's a tease."
Took the babe to Niagra,
Opined she, "Get viagra!
You've ruint it applying the squeeze."
There was an old coach at TAMU,
Who obtusely cried, "Boo-hoo.
When the goin got sticky,
We got pummeled by Ricky!
All because of a pernicious dew."
 
Methinks they doth protest too much.
All this pissin and moanin and such.
When we're tops in the nation,
they'll still be "collie station",
and RC will still be out of touch!
 
agaholic was his name,
but his brain was lame,
he lamented our limericks,
while a$m took its licks,
recruiting is now UT's game.
 
The woodpile the ag$ did cherish,
whose virtues they did embellish,
but now it's in danger,
because of booze in the manger,
another cult tradition is about to perish.
 
Equal Opportunity...A hillbilly coach name of Nutt,
Told the piggies "Your team's in a rut.
I'll turn it around."
Then he did a horns-down,
"Hey Coach, kiss my big, hairy butt!"
The Okies had so much bad lucks,
To get Stoops cost plenty of bucks.
T'was Barry the Boozer
And John Blake the loser
No wonder that blowyou still sucks.
 
to all the teams in the big 12
that wonder why Macks doing so well
all the blue chips can see
Texas is the place to be
and the rest can go to hell. ------------------
"It's a program on the rise. Everybody can see that. Everybody can see what they're fixing to do to people." BJ Johnson
 
rc did so want to win,
that he invited all the athletes in,
but, when they came to see,
they all did quickly flee,
and there's nothing left for rc to do but give it a good spin.
 
There once was an ag named Ja'mar
Found drunk behind the wheel of a car
While he looked at the Judge
He thought "Oh Fugde,
Now I'll end up behind bars."------------------
"From the outside looking in you can't understand it. From the inside looking out you can't explain it"
---Jim Jones
 
they say from the inside you cannot explain
comprehension the 'Horns cannot claim
so the Ags start a new tradition
which is their undying mission
getting together to hump in a "train"
 
RC is a nice guy
I'm glad he is at A&M
I hope they keep him another 10 yearsDamn, this prose stuff is easy...
 
Bevolovin says 20-16
But their losing record he has not seen
He says the Horns are the chumps
While he mounts sheep and then humps
And hits on Leslie the drag queen
 
at the horn stud recruits they did stare,
said the aggies, "it is not fair",
where is rc?
it's easy to see,
with his secretary bent over a chair
 
Oh my goodness, just look what we've started.
We're exploring far regions uncharted.
With the Ags picking fights,
we have reached some new heights,
but anon: please respect the departed.
 
There once was a lineman from Hearne
about Aggies he wanted to learn
but when asked about Sherrill,
RC was over a barrel
so he sighed and said "Horns, it's your turn"
 
How that poetry class at "TU"
we all took is now causing a stew.
So the Ags are all mad.
They don't get it. How sad.
But at least they won't try a haiku!
 
Said a coach from the land of the collie,
This recruiting stuff is just folly.
Except for "DG"
#1 we might be.
But we finished #25, "by golly".Said a coach from the land of the horn.
RC, "Don't be so forlorn".
You got a "good" class
and you don't have to pass.
But the ags know this story is worn.But the collie continued to whine,
With this retort he did opine,
Thanks to Mr. Garvin
our cult is now starvin'
for something except a good D line.For the collies its always "next year".
The death toll they cannot hear.
Till they learn how to throw,
to the bottom they'll go,
but they will always have beer!
Collie is gone.
Sheep are missing.
Swinging gate.
 
Ol' RC he's wearing a frown
His fans now think him a clown
When Ag recruiting went south
They turned down in the mouth
'cause a giant is woke up by Brown.Not recruiting but...Thus spoke the Ag AD named Wally
"We'll show the sips and build Reed, by golly!"
Faced with filling each seat
Groff is now heard to bleat
"We shoulda just stayed in G. Rollie!"All the Aggies they recently moaned
Ja'mar got copped in car loaned
Kyle Field will not be the same
When they change his nickname
From "Big Rumble" to "Our Beloved Tombstoned."Aggies are a gang like the Crips
With handsigns and arcane quick quips
But truth is the real matter
When an Ag's dreams do but shatter
As he's "outscored" again by the 'sips.In 99 and 95 Slocum promised MNC
He said, "We'll show the country!"
Things got pretty rough
Through teams Raider and Buff
Oh well, again it's Alamo City.------------------
"Ladies and gentlemen, always remember that The Eyes of Texas Are Upon You!"——President William L. Prather in his first address to University of Texas students, 1899.
 
Those ags have no sense of humor
But they are kings of the rumor
Their logic is bad
And their coach is sad
But their school grows like a tumor------------------
~v~ Hook 'em Horns ~v~ ... 1999 Big XII South Champions ... ~v~ Hook 'em Horns ~v~
 
I can't get enough of this... Haiku time!Aggies lovin' sheep,
What ugly sight to behold,
Please stop; grow salad.R.C. says B.J.,
Aggies need blocking from you,
Cadets grab crotch WHOOOOP!!!Jamaar Toombs blows smoke,
From bong up R.C.'s bunghole,
Let's get high, drunk, VROOOOM...
 
These limericks are creating big yuks,
Such talent should make you big bucks,
To rip Ags is sublime,
And so easy we rhyme,
But I agree haiku sucks.
 
The once was a QB named Mock
who the Aggies thought was a lock
instead he chose t.u.
and to Austin he flew
because MackIII was sucking his cockChance said, "I just want to throw the rock"
for the NFL I'll be a lock
hope you like it just fine
with your *** on the pine
where you'll be till you learn how to block
 
One night unable to sleep,
Out the window WinaGs did creep,
Again poking ovine!
His wife did opine,
He said, "No", "I was out shaggin' sheep.
 
An Ag lost his love, so forlorn...
he then wished he had ne'er been born.
Said a friend as he kneeled,
"There's more sheep in the field.
Look! She's purty and hadn't been shorn!"There once was a corner from Temple,
with great speed but an ugly chin dimple.
He wasn't that smart,
but gave RC a start
by saying "I'll come here, it's so simple!"
 
Toombs doesn’t smoke weed,
Crutchfield fills a need,
We didn’t need Brock,
Long’s better than Mock,
And Ferguson equals Big 3.
[This message has been edited by Poor Aggies (edited 02-04-2000).]
 
"I'd rather have D. Long than Mock,
Or the tight end we signed, not Brock."
This delusion I see, from the stupid aggie,
Makes their program a laughing stock.------------------
There's no roughing the passer on an option.
 
The ags say their recruits are the best,
on red shirting their claims do rest;
"we won't face the facts,
about J'mar's illegal acts,
after all our recruits are our guests".Mediocrity,
Receiver falls down again,
time to punt,recruit.
 
Receivers at UT can go deep,
Surely with the passers they reap,
Slokem didn't get none,
I hope he's not done,
His only bribes now are with sheep.
 
Ol' Army just just can't stand "T.U."
They still think they have "Wrecking Crew"
While Mack gets the studs
RC gets the duds
ag football - just call it "P-U"
To Texas came hardworking young Mack
The recruiting he loved to attack
The ags said "RC,
You're better than he.
If not, then we'll call Kubiak."
 
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