Funny sayings of old time country folk

[Chop]

These ones make no sense to me, but I've heard them plenty of times:


He's smiling so big, he's got a ****-eating grin.

He's happier than a pig in ****.

 

[Chop]

While on bodily waste....


Alvin did a piss-poor job cuttin' that grass.

 

[Horn6721]

Chop
Good ones.

 

[LousianaHorn]

"wouldnb't piss in the rain with a slicker on for a boxcar load of em"


when something was cheap, heard my oldman use it and he got it from my grand pa I know.

 

[LousianaHorn]

he's a yankee snare drummer straight from the heart of "Yonkers".

same grandad, served in the NAVY in WWI and was at Brooklyn Navy Yard for awhile.

 

[Sangre Naranjada]

What the Sam Hill?

 

[Horn6721]

Heard that a lot from my GrandDad.
Never know who Sam Hill was.

 

[Sangre Naranjada]

Heard that a lot from my GrandDad.
Never know who Sam Hill was.

I googled it. Learned a little something. I encourage you to do the same.

 

[Horn6721]

I already had.
There ain't nothing that hasn't been axked on the Interwebz

 

[Vol Horn 4 Life]

Yer just pissin' into the wind.

 

[Chop]

What the Sam Hill?

What in Tarnation

Well I'll be

Goodnight Irene

 

[Chop]

Playing grab-***

Snipe hunting

Lollygagging

 

[Chop]

And don't you dare "look a gift horse in the mouth."

That would be rude.

 

[Chop]

Poor thing.... looks like she was ridden hard and put away wet.

 

[nashhorn]

Ain’t got the sense God gave a goose.
Dumber than a stump

 

[Vol Horn 4 Life]

Dumber than a stum

Dumber than a box of rocks

 

[BevoJoe]

"Don't let the screen door hit ya' where the good Lord split ya."

 

[BevoJoe]

To someone giving a lousy explanation, "Man, that dog don't hunt!"

 

[BevoJoe]

"You lie when the truth would sound better."

 

[BevoJoe]

What the "Sam Hill!"

Here's the origin of the saying "What the Sam Hill!" Supposedly, Sam Hill was a Michigan surveyor in the 1800s who “allegedly used such foul language that his name became a euphemism for swear words,” according to Wikipedia, so it has to be true . . . (yea right). Another source says it's a euphemism for “hell.”

 

[Chop]

"Don't let the screen door hit ya' where the good Lord split ya."

this one seems to be very popular

 

[Chop]

Dumber than a box of rocks

R U sayin' he's maybe not the sharpest knife in the drawer?

 

[Chop]

If it's got tits or a transmission, sooner or later it's gonna give you trouble!

This one wins the "Most True and Accurate" of all the old time country sayings.

Just sayin....

 

[Chop]

A funny saying of old time country high school football coaches:

Now that's some good blocking; you could "Drive a Mack Truck through that hole."


(rural, urban, suburban--in Texas they all pretty much say that one I think)

 

[SabreHorn]

Chop,

The transmission line is a watered down version of

If it floats, flies, or fucks, rent it don't buy

 

[Vol Horn 4 Life]

R U sayin' he's maybe not the sharpest knife in the drawer?

Not even the sharpest tool in the shed.

After seeing so many variations, that alone is very interesting. All the similar things but regionally gets changed just a smidge.

 

[Chop]

What a slicker.

He thought you had to hire cattle guards!

 

[Chop]

Jim Bob, I’m letting you go to the concert without adult supervision, but you stick with your older brother “like white on rice.”

 

[LousianaHorn]

he's so dumb he couldn't pour piss out of a boot with directions written on the sole

 

[Sangre Naranjada]

R U sayin' he's maybe not the sharpest knife in the drawer?

Nor the brightest crayon in the box.