Stay at home wives with no kids

From a relatively well-paid, workaholic female's perspective, it makes sense to me. Several of my male friends have fiances or wives who have started to stay home (none of them made more than $35-$40k). I pay $75/week for a maid, and my favorite day to come home is the day she has been there, I have thought about having her come twice a week. Not having to do laundry is awesome. I make it to the grocery store about once every two weeks, same with the dry cleaners. Having to meet an exterminator at the house once a quarter is a huge pain. My mom came and stayed with me for a week so I could have work done at my house, and it was amazing. Dinner was ready when I got home, and the house was clean. She ran all of the little errands I never get around to. I would honestly love to have someone that I liked being around taking care of the stuff I need taken care of on a daily basis.

Anyway, I can see why the convenience of having someone to run a household would far outweigh the benefit of an additional salary in certain circumstances. That being said, I don't know that I would ever be happy being the person "running the household". However, my feelings on how much I would like it seem to have a pretty high inverse correlation with how much I like my job at any given time.
 
When you have two people working serious hours **** doesn't get done around the house or it only gets done on the weekends and you have to do it together and you don't get to really rest, relax and recharge when you are worried about all that other ****.

I spend seemingly half my saturday at target and the grocery store and running errands that would not happen if my wife stayed at home. She makes great money so the equation is a little different. If she would have made 30k while I was making 250 a year and working 60 or 70 hours a week I would have practically demanded she stay home and take care of that stuff- especially if she didn't love her job and find fulfillment- no way I'd want her to work for the paycheck if that was all the money it would be.

And, when life is hectic relationships often times take a back seat. That's part of why my life sucks so bad and why I'm doing a career change.

Again, I can't stress enough how much I believe that it is the person who stays home JOB to do all this **** work like drycleaning run, target, grocery store, cooking and cleaning.

These women who stay home and expect their husband to do 50% of the household chores are selfish, whiny beyotches. That's ridiculous. If he makes the money (or she, I'm a liberated guy that way) then the other one better have a nice house, clean, with dinner on the table and the household chores done.

Echo the above poster about the maid- my favorite 24 days of the year are every other thursday when the maid has been there. If every day I came home to that, and a dinner, and the shopping done, life would be good. What is a 30k a year job compared to that if you don't really need the money?
 
Hmmm...my wife is a stay-at-home-mom currently on sabbatical from teaching. It was tough for her to choose to quit her job but with 3 boys at home it ultimately didn't make sense for her to work just to put the kids in daycare. The youngest starts full-day Kindergarten this year. My wife is writing a book so she intends to stay home for 1 more year just to finish it. It's one of her life goals so I want to support her in this endeavor.

With that said, though I'll like the extra income when she returns to the work my life will get much more hectic. I do the laundry, empty the dishwasher, sometimes take care of the yard and home remodel projects. That's it. My wife takes care of everything else, including a very healthy organic cooking lifestyle. Is she the best housecleaner? No but the house is clean enough considering she has 4 boys to deal with (including myself). She works out at home nearly daily and is very frugal in terms of how she spends money.

I'm going to miss her help around the house when the housework is again split 50-50. Heck, I'd love for her to be an author working out of the house just to keep up the current balance of workload around the house. It allows me to work 8am - 7pm which is something I actually enjoy.
 
I think we all just look at life a little differently. I don't do a damn thing around the house unless I want to. Even then it is usually running the smoker if I am there long enough. Sometimes I do a little yard work because I like to once every couple of years.

I have worked hard to get the places I have. I want to enjoy them when I have the chance. I don't care if it is getting done by someone living there or if it is hired help. As long as it is getting done, before I get there.

Maybe it just boils down to how you enjoy spending your time. I like to work and put in tons of hours. One hour of work will pay for a lot of domestic chores.
 
One of the advantages to having someone run the house is that I can shop during the day, when the crowds aren't so crazy. There is a huge difference between shopping at 10:00 in the morning of a week day and shopping in the evenings or on weekends. I spend much less time hanging out in lines shopping during the day. It's also simpler to schedule with repair people and vendors. I can meet them at times that are hard for people working full time. In fact, when I make appointments with repair men, or even Vets, Dr.s and hair dressers, I intentionally take the times in the middle of the morning or afternoon. I go out of my way to leave the early morning, lunch time and 4-5 times for folks who work.

Last week I put extra flooring in our attic to make room for some of the things we'd been storing in guest room closets. Then I cleaned out those closets and reorganized the office/sewing room. My sister-in-law is going to move in with us, with her 9 year old son and it would have been really hard to get the house ready for them, if I'd been working. I also drove to IL week before last to bring back their pets, to make their move easier. I couldn't have helped them, if I'd been working. Having a flexible schedule in the house hold is the real advantage. I know there are jobs that allow for a flex schedule, but not working makes it REALLY flexible.
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What do you do all day?" is a question Anne Marie Davis, 34, says she gets a lot.

Davis, who lives in Lewisville, Texas, isn't a mother, nor does she telecommute. She is a stay-at-home wife, which makes her something of a pioneer in the post-feminist world.
Ten years ago, she was an "overwhelmed" high school English teacher. "I didn't have time for my husband, " she says, "and I didn't have a life."
She presented the idea of staying home to her husband, a Web engineer. "I told him it was something I wanted to do, and he supported it. It was a great relief."
Dr. Scott Haltzman, author of "The Secrets of Happily Married Women," says stay-at-home wives constitute a growing niche. "In the past few years, many women who are well educated and trained for career tracks have decided instead to stay at home," he says. While his research is ongoing, he estimates that more than 10 percent of the 650 women he's interviewed who choose to stay home are childless.
Daniel Buccino, a Johns Hopkins University School of Medicine clinical social worker and psychotherapist, says stay-at-home wives are the latest "status symbols."
"It says, 'We make enough money that we both don't need to work outside the home,'" he says. "And especially with the recent economic pressures, a stay-at-home spouse is often an extreme and visible luxury."

June Cleaver, minus Beaver and Wally
Davis says her life isn't luxurious. "Tuesdays are my laundry day," she says. "I go grocery shopping on Wednesdays and clean house on Thursdays." Mondays and Fridays are reserved for appointments and other errands.
But her schedule also allows for charity work and leisure: reading, creative writing and exploring new hobbies, like sewing.
It's a lifestyle, Davis says, that has made her happier and brought her closer to her husband. "We're no longer stressed out," she says; because she takes care of the home, there are virtually no "honey-do" lists to hand over.
Stay-at-home guilt
"If you told me years ago that I was going to be a stay-at-home wife, I would have laughed at you," says Catherine Zoerb, 27. Yet after the Wichita, Kansas, resident finished graduate school in 2005, she found herself unemployed, childless -- and strangely happy. With her husband's support, Zoerb decided to just stay home.
"I was able to clip coupons, do all the chores and make nice dinners," she says. "I was much less stressed and tense."
But she was concerned, too -- about not using her master's degree in English and how future employers would view her work history. "I worried about gaps in my resume," she says. And there was something else: "I thought about the feminist movement -- all those women who worked so hard so that I could go out and have a good career, and I was kind of saying 'no thanks.'"
Recently, Zoerb took a temporary job at an engineering firm. It will boost her resume, and although the Zoerbs don't need the money, it will help pay down their mortgage. Still, she hopes to return to stay-at-home wifedom soon.
"I'd never say that a woman shouldn't work," she says. "But I don't see what good it would do to work in a job that I couldn't stand, and if I have the choice not to, why wouldn't I take that opportunity?"
Retro marriage, 21st century-style
"Everyone seems to be OK with women staying home when they have kids," says Davis, who currently doesn't plan to have children. "I've actually heard people say that women who don't work are a drain on society."
Don't be too quick to judge, says Haltzman. Women might give up a job to focus on an advanced degree, pursue artistic or creative goals, or deal with health issues.
Surprisingly, though, Haltzman says the biggest draw is homemaking itself. "Many women I talk to take care of the household seriously, and they want to focus on caring for the home, whether or not it involves children."
Sometimes a wife's desires don't align with her husband's. "I hear frustration from men whose wives choose not to work," Haltzman says, "but only if there are financial stresses. One of the realities is that few men appreciate the scope and difficulties of managing a household."
Kirk Zoerb is an exception: The 27-year-old engineer says he's happiest when his wife is jobless.
"When Catherine stays at home, I feel the house is more together because she has the time to do things like in-depth cleaning and can be more attentive to the garden," he says. "She also has more time to find good deals at secondhand stores, garage sales and at grocery stores." As a couple, he says, "we have more energy and are generally emotionally healthier."
Still, "I don't believe that the woman has to be the exclusive cook, cleaner or shopper, and I don't believe the man must be the breadwinner. I wouldn't mind staying at home while Catherine works!"
 
I don't understand how people talk about "how busy" and "stressed out" they are make it through life. It's not that hard man. If you and your family have health, you have more than enough time in the day to get everything done during the course of a week while holding a job.

In my working life, almost every person that talks about being "soooo busy" and "just stressed out" has no idea what is important nor how to manage work. Figure out what matters and what doesn't, how to get it done and then dive in and get it done. If life is really kicking your *** that badly, you probably need to both smarten and toughen up.
 
I can understand that the stores are less crowded on the weekdays but WTF are you buying everyday that justifies staying home as opposed to working during the week and shopping on the weekends? That excuse for not working is a little shallow.

Don't get me wrong, if you have a gig that allows you to stay home and run a couple of errands per day, I'm envious. Sounds like you have an easy life. Nothing wrong with that.
 
While I think couples should come up with any plan they can to make their relationship work, I doubt I could be happy with someone who stays home and cleans, cooks and shops all day. What the hell are you going to talk about when you get home? Having a partner who does and thinks interesting things is worth a little extra stress with time management.
 
I can one-up that article. I'm noticing a trend where stay-at-home wives are also hiring maids.
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I know LOTS of women, some wives of friends that have kids and stay at home and hire maids. they are not rich but have nice homes and are well off but i doubt they are saving much. my favorite is listening to them complain about how tiring their life is..i laugh.
 
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