Twas The Night Before Ricky - 5th anniversary

Longhorn Lady

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We wrote this 5 years ago. How time flies. Enjoy

Twas The Night Before Ricky

Twas the night before Ricky, and all through the state
Not an aggie was sleeping, awaiting their fate.
The banners were hung 'round the stadium with flare
'Cause everyone knew Earl and Tony would be there.

The Longhorns were nestled in their place of repose
While the game plan for Ricky, Coach Mack's team really knows.
My family in their burnt orange and I in my vest,
Climbed into our seats in the upper deck west.

When out on the field the Longhorn band came
Performing with majesty their famous Pregame.
The APO's raced with the 'object' they drag
And scurried to afloat the great TEXAS FLAG!

UT's energy landed on the maroon from "The Zone",
The fear in their eyes revealingly shone.
When from the south tunnel should finally appear,
But rumblings and chanting from our glorious Steers.

And a massive strength coach could be seen in the fog,
We all recognized our awesome Mad Dog!
The Jumbotron played the Longhorn Stampede
And the refs blew their whistles for the game to proceed.

Run Ricky! Throw Major! Catch Kwame and Wane!
Sack Cedric! Tackle Dusty! Block Russel and Jay!
To the sound of the "Eyes" and the "Texas Fight" call,
Now Hook 'Em Horns! Hook 'Em Horns! Hook 'Em Horns all!

Through the yards, down the field, to the goal line they've known,
Steadily picking away through the Wrecking Crew's moan.
With each Ricky carry the fans would all rally,
As we 'minused' his yardage from Tony's record tally.

As the energy rose my hands worked to steady,
As I anxiously got the video ready.
From the Texas 40 and needing only eleven,
Ricky soon got his yardage and gave the team seven!

We jumped and we screamed with the eighty-three thou'
And all we could say was a mighty, "Oh Wow!"
Tears rose to our eyes for the quiet young man
Who crashed through the record books, and among giants would stand.

Now, back to the game, as the horns played with pride,
And the scoreboard stayed tilted to our burnt orange side.
As inevitable as ags say the bonfire will burn
We found ourselves involved in the old 'tidal turn'

With two minutes remaining and the Horns down by one
We were now involved in this great day's best fun.
Major led the team wisely, Kwame caught like a master,
And Ricky show all once more that he was just faster.

On his home-field's last carry he almost broke free,
But Smokey fired off with Stockton's game-winning three!
The post-game was inspiring with Dorsett, Campbell, and Crow,
Ricky Williams and the Heisman we all definitely know!

Mack Brown had encouraged the crowd to stay late,
On this day the thousands would all still await.
We walked 'round all day saying, "Great! The Horns Gottem'!"
And later viewed the Tower lit orange top to bottom!

We sat on the Mall and reflected anew
On sixty-seven Texas victories o're the aggies, "Whew!"
You could hear us start chanting, as we'd done in the past...

"ON WE ROLL TO THE COTTON BOWL!"

Let's get our tickets fast!

Mary Ann Petru
UT '72
 
Awesome
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Great read, and gets better every time!
Mine isn't quite as old -- I wrote it in 2000, the year after the bonfire game; I was stationed at the Pentagon at the time, and my wife's folks had driven up from Texas to spend Thanksgiving with us (I really like my in-laws, despite what the poem says). I called out a lot of ags by (Internet bulletin board) name in this one (at the end of each stanza). Funny how a lot of them are no longer around -- or, are just keeping vewwy, vewwy quiet
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Poe Ags! (Or, "Let Them Eat Crow" -- get it? Crow? Raven?
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)

Once upon a midnight dreary,
While I pondered though eyes bleary
Over many a driveling web post full of vitriolic bore
While I back-clicked, merely sighing,
(They’re envious, yet still denying!)
Continued still my careful plying,
Eyeing each post -- smack galore!
"’Tis so typical," I muttered,
"gomers posting smack galore.

Scoreboard matters -- nothing more."


Ah, distinctly I remember,
Tales of how they would dismember,
Every Longhorn first-team member -- wrought a ghost on DKR’s floor.
Eagerly they sought our sorrow,
(Plainly, they would win tomorrow!
Simms? Him, they’d force-feed escargot
Burrowed from its earthen door
As they pummeled him unhindered
Into DKR’s shattered floor.)

Baseless hopes, and nothing more.


And the caustic, opportune
Bombast of the maroon buffoons
Thrilled me, filled me with fantastic ‘musement never felt before,
So that now, to still the guffaws
(Lest I wake the dreaded in-laws!) --
"’Tis some lad in ag pajamas
Posting all this smack galore,
Holding teddy by his rear paws
As he pecks out smack galore."

(13 - 0, and no one more.)


Presently my mirth grew stronger,
As the venom spewed forth longer,
"Lad," I thought, "(or lassie?), truly, your rancid rants I abhor;
But you’re a small-minded kiddie,
Worthy not of hate, but pity,
Mired in maroon stupid-ity,
Witty as a hardwood floor."
(Actually, that is an insult
To the blameless hardwood floor.)

(WinaGs, then, and no one more?)


Deep into that long night peering,
I perused the jilted jeering,
Maroon lunacy no Longhorn ever dared to read before;
But my humor was unbroken
(What were these poooor aggies smokin’?)
As their hate-filled words were spoken,
Jealous tokens which implore:
"Aggies ALWAYS win the halftime,
Never mind the final score!"

(muy, would you care for more?)


Back into the new posts turning,
Laughter in my soul still churning,
Soon again I saw bravado somewhat bolder than before.
Ferg would fly, and Toombs would roll
(Don’t roll THAT, Toombs -- you’ll lose parole!)
Ty would rip Simms a new hole,
And Williams would be shown the door.
Don’t you know that aggie d-backs
Run the 40 in oh-four?

(guido, do you know the score?)


"Prohet!" thought I, "thing unhuman!
Prophet still, if ag or ewe-man!
By the orange sky above us, by TPE (to whom I defer),
Tell this soul with humor laden,
If aggie breakfast will be made in
Time to get them fed (they stayed in
Collie Station to be sure!)
If ‘morrow’s game you can see played in
Present, you’re a prophet pure!"

(Observer, please observe the score!)


Dawned the new day, noon time passing,
‘Round the TV screen now amassing,
Victims of a geographic distance which we all deplore.
Gathering D.C. Texas Exes,
(Having missed Hex Rally hexes)
Cheering our beloved Horns back in Texas
From our nation’s eastern shore,
Watching the Burnt Orange home team
Move the chains and up the score!

(jdwAg: aggie, feeling "poooor"!)


Now the final gun approaches,
On maroon dreams it encroaches,
As they scatter like coach roaches, heading for DKR’s door
Dead! The dreams of maroon conquest;
Dead! Their high hopes for this contest;
Lost! Their red-eyed tears can attest
They’ll rue this day for ever more.
And their souls from out the shadows that fall on DKR’s floor

Shall be lifted -- NEVER MORE!!!!!!
 
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