What you all are saying makes perfect sense if you're God-hating heathens. Be contemptuous because others were contemptuous with you or you think they'll be contemptuous with you if you raise some issue with them. Answer their past hostility with hostility.
However, if you're a Christian (as most of us claim to be), the right thing to do is to love and pray for your enemies, love your neighbor as yourself, to turn the other cheek, to show mercy, and treat others not as they treated you but as you would want to be treated.
I think the real source of our disagreement is that you all seem to view courtesy in rhetoric as a sign of weakness or "cuckishness." It's not. It's a sign of strength and confidence in one's position. It's also disarming and opens minds to different perspectives, and isn't that what we want? (That's a big reason why Jesus instructed us as he did.) I've never persuaded anyone of anything by being belligerent, and no one has ever persuaded me of anything that way. Everyone I've persuaded of anything started with courtesy and respect, - regardless of how they treated me. It was true for me in the courtroom and in other contexts. Trust me, it works.
