Purity balls

I would guess there are 2 types of girls that are at these balls: Girls that no one wants to touch, and those who's fathers are completely oblvious to the fact that their daughters have a new guy each week.
 
also, i forgot to add, it is a mother's place to talk to her daughter about sex and all that stuff. seems weird for a father to be the one to hold the key to their daughter's sexuality.
 
Yeah, this is way worse to hear about these dads doing this than the families out there with no dad present at all.

Seriously, this strikes me as a tad creepy. And I think there's such a thing as taking too much of an interest or going to far.

But damn, some of you will jump someone's *** in the name of getting after religion, even if the subject is someone that is basically doing some good. The alternative of absent fathers is certainly not praised, but definitely ignored, even though it deserves more ridicule and shame.
 
Yes, because the only two options are having these creepy "purity balls" or having your child get knocked up at age 16. There is no in between.
 
So having premarital sex is akin to stealing or doing drugs?

I don't mean to give you too much ****, netslave. You can raise your kids how you see fit. But the rhetorical question "Why can we accept the responsibility to tell our children to not do stupid things like steal or do drugs, but we scoff at the idea of telling our children to not have sex?" is a bit silly.

Depending on the maturity of the girl at issue, it may be a very good idea to dissuade her from having sex while in high school. But to exercise your fatherly esteem to encourage her to remain "pure" (again, WTF?) until marriage? I just can't get down with that. The fact is that biology takes hold, and more often than not these "pure" little virgins preserve their hymen at the expense of their O-ring, which is more dangerous from an STD standpoint and and no less emotionally complicated than standard, run of the mill sex.

Of course, it does have the benefit of not leading to pregnancy. And that's nice for Dad. That way he won't be embarassed by a baby bump revealing that his little girl is "impure."
 
As a former young horndog, many of whose friends are of similar character, we all knew well the universal truth -- the easiest girls are the ones with daddy issues. It's actually a reasonably well established fact that women who grew up with a strong father-daughter relationship are less likely to become pregnant as teens, etc. (Really, across the board for both girls and boys, they are finding that having a good and involved father is a HUGE factor in kids turning out right, but that's another tangent).

As a father, have a GOOD and loving relationship with your daughter. If you do that, then some guidance about sex will be a naturally occurring part of the relationship. Also, she won't go seeking emotional validation elsewhere.

Don't give her hang-ups about sex (that's doing a disservice later in life to both her and her future husband). Don't make sex out to be a dirty thing if it's had in any way shape or form outside of church-sanctioned marriage. Instead, help her understand the entanglements, both practical and emotional (a BIG problem for teen girls who think that the 23 year old who pays them so much attention "really loves me"), and the real-world benefits of making wise choices.

Maybe that choice will be to have sex -- ideally when she is emotionally and intellecutally ready for it.

If my daughter is a 20 year old college girl, and she's really trying to fit in, and she thinks the rich-kid jerk she's been seeing will REALLY like her, and will finally give her the emotional fulfillment she wants, if she just puts out -- well, I don't want her having sex in that situation.

If my daughter is a 20 year old college student, is in a serious relationship with mutual respect, and both parties understand and are willing to take appropriate precautions -- well, I'm not crazy about it, because dude, somebody will be boning my daughter (hell, I'll have the same problem if she's 30 and married to the guy). But I will generally and begrudgingly be "okay" with it.

And I will do my best to raise a daughter who doesn't need to go to a random skeezbag to find love, affection, and validation. Do that, and you've won 90% of the battle. You can keep your creepy key.

I'm going to raise my daughter so that she understands that only one person holds the key to her cooter -- that person is her, and she should embrace that power.
 
waiting for sex until marriage huh? yeah, that is a good plan.

i am certainly not exciting about the thought of my little girl have sex in a few years, but i'm not sure i want her to wait until marriage... as if was any of my business. seems like to me that is experience that most every adult needs before entering marriage... but i am not old fashioned or religious. i think god would have to be cruel to give us the tools and hormones to have sex, but make us wait many years to do so. i am not one to believe that god is always testing us. i am hoping god is bit more evolved than that.

i will just talk to her about sex and the proper use of it. it is not a tool to get things you want or to build self esteem. that is my main concern.... why she would engage in sex.

she is 11 so hopefully i'll have at least 6 or 7 years. save your okie jokes.
 
Just for informational purposes from The Link ....

risk_lg.jpg


1. Determine the total number of sexual partners you have had.
2. Find that number on the LEFT side of the chart.
3. Look all the way across the page to find the number of people you have been exposed to.

These numbers are assuming that your partners have had only the same number of sexual partners as you. If your partners have had more sexual partners, YOUR RISK IS GREATER than the number shown. This is also assuming that your partners are totally honest with you. GET SMART!

Statistics

* 1 in 5 Americans has been infected with an STD (American Social Health Association).
* The fastest growing population contracting AIDS is women. In 1985, 7% of AIDS cases reported were women. That percentage increased to 14% in 1992, and to 23% in 1999 (AIDS.ORG).
* Sexually active adolescent girls have the highest risk of cervical infections because the ectropion, or delicate tissue that surrounds a young woman's cervix, is not fully formed until she is 18 years old. It is, therefore, very vulnerable to blood borne infections (Alan Gutmacher Institute, 1994).
* Approximately 2/3 of all people who acquire STDs are under 25 (American Social Health Association).
* PID or Pelvic Inflammatory Disease is the most rapidly increasing cause of infertility in the United States. Researchers have estimated that a sexually active 15-year-old has a 1 in 8 chance of developing PID. By the age of 24, the probability decreases to 1 in 80 (The Medical Institute).
* There are presently more than 25 significant STDs (Center for Disease Control).
* In the United States, more than 65 million people are currently living with an incurable STD. An additional 15 million people become infected each year (ibid).
* In 1999, reports indicated that strains of Human Papilloma Virus (HPV) were present in 99% of samples tested for cervical cancer. It is estimated that 75% of sexually active Americans are or have previously been infected with HPV (The Medical Institute).
* While almost all STDs can be treated to relieve pain or minimize symptoms, there is no cure for viral STDs, including Human Papilloma Virus (HPV), Human Immunodeficiency Virus (HIV), and Herpes (ibid).
 
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