Post Your Favorite Aggie Joke

B

Bluepies

Guest
Mine:

What do an aggie and a longhorn have in common?
They both applied to UT.
 
This is real, and not a joke, but still makes me laugh.

aggie_hurricane_prep.jpg
 
Did you hear about the aggy who was watching the news one evening....the story was about the fact that most accidents occur within one mile of the home.

His solution.....?........



















He moved
 
Hear about the big fire at the aNm library?
Burned both books. And one hadn't been colored in yet.

aggy class ring is a ring pull top off a beer can.
Comes with a built-in nose picker.
 
An Ag and a Horn are stranded at an airport and start bragging about their respective watering holes.
The Horn says that every other round is free during happy hour on Fridays at his bar in Austin.
The Ag thinks quietly about it for a while . He then responds by saying that on Fridays at his bar in College Station one can buy one round and get the next seven free and then get to go the back room and have sex all night.
The Horn finds this story incredible and asks the Ag if he does this regularly. The Ag then says no, but it happened to his sister.....
 
What's the difference between an aggy girl and garbage?

The garbage gets taken out twice a week.
 
Two Ags are laying up in their barracks one Saturday morning when the Ag on the top bunk yells down at the Ag on the bottom bunk, "Hey, has the mailman come yet?"

The Ag on the bottom bunk yells back, "No, but he's getting glassy-eyed."
 
Why is it so difficult to solve a murder in College Station, TX?
A. All the DNA is the same and there are no dental records.
 
An Aggie walks into a bar with a huge jar full of money sitting on the bar, he inguires to the bartender about the money. The bartender tells him he must complete 3 tasks to win the money.
1- knock the 7 ft 350 lb Shaquelle O’Neil look-alike out cold with 1 punch.
2-There is a pitbull out back on a log chain with a sore tooth, you must pull
that tooth.
3- There is a lesbian in the room upstairs who has never been sexually
satisfied by a man, you must satisfy her completely.
The Aggie says “no problem” walks to the end of the bar and knocks the 7 footer out cold with a single punch.
He then heads out the back door, where growling, barking, snarling, whining, then yelping is heard.
He stumbles back into the bar, clothes tattered and bleeding profusely and says, “OK now where’s that lesbian who needs her tooth pulled?
 
Did you know toothpaste was invented in College Station?

It had to be, otherwise it would be called teethpaste.
 
Aggy walks into bar on sixth street with a frog on his head. Bartender asks, " can I help you?"

Frog says, "yes, can you get this wart off my ***?"
 
Why do birds fly upside down over College Station?

There is nothing worth shitting on.


--------------------------------------------------------------------

Two Aggies are walking down the street and see a dog in an alley licking himself in the genitals. One looks at the other and says, "Boy, I sure wish I could do that!".

The other says, "You better pet it first".

(alternate punch line: That dog's gonna bite you.)
 
Did you hear about the Aggie who was flying to Alaska?

They had just taken off when the pilot came over the PA and told everyone that they had just lost their #4 engine and would be about and hour late to their destination.
Later, he announced that they had just lost their #2 engine and they would be about 2 hours late to their destination. Still later, he announced that they had lost their #1 engine and they would be about 3 hours late to their destination.
The Aggie turned to the person sitting next to him and said, "Man, I hope we don't lose the #3 engine or we will be up here forever."
 
Two Ags were walking down the street when they saw a sign reading, "Luxury Cruise $100". They went inside to sign up, where they were promptly knocked over the head, robbed, taken out back and thrown in a river. As they drifted downstream, one Ag asked, " I wonder if they serve drinks on this cruise?" and the other replied, "They didn't last year."
 
Why don't aggies count sheep?
It's hard to fall asleep with a boner.
 
Two aggy are walking down a dusty country road.

They see a dog laying in the road and licking its balls.

First aggy says: "don't you wish you could do that"?

Second aggy says: "yeah but that dog would probably bite you"
 
Did you hear about the two seater Cessna that went down in College Station?

It crashed into a cemetery and so far they have found 354 bodies.
 
aggie kidnaps girl from oklahoma. he sends her back to her parents with a ransom note. they send her back to the aggie with the money.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

Weekly Prediction Contest

* Predict HORNS-AGGIES *
Sat, Nov 30 • 6:30 PM on ABC

Recent Threads

Prediction Results Threads

2024 Schedules

Back
Top