Wedding Question

G

goofyboy

100+ Posts
I am supposed to be in a wedding in two weeks. The guy was the best man at my wedding. We are good friends.

Saturday night was his bachlor / bachlorette party. After the bars, we get a call from his woman that he is in a fight in their hotel room. By the time i arrive, fight is over and all that is left is my buddy and his lady. Her clothes are covered in blood. the room is covered, as well as an elevator. I have no idea why there was a fight.

This is probably the 4th or 5th incident that has occured since they got ingaged. They have ranged from him getting out of her car while it was still moving, to sit at a gas station for 5 hours to him getting mad at her while drunk and peeing on her car.

They are a trainwreck.

I am against this wedding. I do not think they are at a time in their lives when they should be getting married. They BOTH have a drinking problem, and most of their issues come from this.

The wedding is in two weeks. Being in the wedding, i understand that it is my job to be there to represent the couple and stand in front of God, family and friends and show support for this union.

Am I a hypocrit for going through with it? Is it worth causing more problems for their wedding to stand behind my principles? Would you still be in the wedding?

thanks for your time.
 
You could have declined the offer to be best man a long time ago. At this point all you could do is privately tell him your concern but two weeks out is a little late.
 
They aren't going to call off the wedding this late in the game. If you voice your concerns all it will do is create tension and ruin the wedding. I know you feel guilty by "supporting" their union before God by standing up there next to them, but at this point the best thing to do is support your friend so that he knows you will be there when this marriage becomes a disaster.

As a side note, were you saying the bride had a busted forehead, etc?? If someone messed up my face right before my wedding there would be HELL to pay, whether it was the groom or not!
 
no. bride and groom are ok. groom messed up the brides friend pretty good.

thanks for the advice. appreciate it.
 
I think we're all more interested in the dirty details that led to a guy getting his nose broken than whether you should stand up in his wedding.
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You are all wrong.
It is much better to call it off even one hour before the ceremony than enter into a bad marriage. Talk to him now. Do it. Express your concerns, maybe even with the other family members and friends.
Are you going to remain silent when the minister says, "Does anyone here know why these two asshats should not be married?" You are going to pass out from biting your tongue.
At least say something now, maybe it won't change anything, but you will have expressed your feelings.
 
The only reason people don't do what accuratehorn is suggesting is because everyone expects most marriages to fail -- and most do.

I don't think it's unreasonable to talk to the groom about a bloody hotel brawl. If that's not an icebreaker, what is? You're his friend. Burying the topic is not very friend-like. Just remain open.
 
Glad to hear he's OK, i didn't really mean to mess him up that bad but she was too hot to turn down.
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All kidding aside it sounds like two trains headed for eachother and you can't stop it.
 
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