Stress

R

Rip76

1,000+ Posts
First let me begin by saying.. F Stress
Now that's out of the way.

I've been very stressed out lately, with changes in breathing patters and waking up in the middle of the night.
I was reading from a website this morning about stress and causes of stress...

I will list what they listed, and put something out to the side.

1. Illness, either personal or of a family member or friend.

(Starting in 2001, my best friend Matt passed away. On the day of his funeral, my uncle had a stroke)

2. Death of a friend or loved one
(My mom 2005 and uncle last December)

3. Problems in a personal relationship (None)

4. Work overload (Ha)

5. Starting a new job
(Started with this company in 1998 in the laboratory. Loved my job but wanted more $$$. Got the terminal manager position here.
Now I run 4 terminals = manage 40 people.)

6. Unemployment (not yet)

7. Retirement (no)

8. Pregnancy (First child is due on June 20th)

9. Crowds (no)

10. Relocation (other than traveling for work, no)

11. Daily hassles (haha)

12. Legal problems
13. Financial concerns
(I'll put these two together.... long story short, after mom passed away, we let my brother have the house.. Dumb move. we'll all sorts of problems from this)

14. Perfectionism (of course)

I'll also add that i've almost fully quit smoking as well... (but the problems started before this)

Anyone have any good tips on relaxation, coping with stress...etc..?
 
I really hope that is what this is....

I had a check up last year and everything seemed fine. But with the waking up at night like this, all I can think is.. heart failure or something.
 
Regular exercise. Relaxation exercises/meditation. Counting your blessings. Look for the silver lining in the storm cloud. Avoid rumination about problems.
 
Number 1, I would Stop looking as stress in the terms of something being wrong with you. You are fine.
Take a look at nature, what mammal do you know of that does not have stress in their lives, and portrays this in everyday events?
Stress is natural.

Now granted there are varying levels and different ways of coping with excess stress.

When I take my dog out in the morning, sometimes it is beneficial to stand in the sun and breathe in deep. It sounds pedestrian but it can really clear your mind and relieve some of the more minuscule thoughts that continue to magnify your everyday problems.

My parents, and I am sure yours as well tend to you use the old adage that it could be worse. Obviously this is a relative thought but can be helpful if you put things into perspective. As much as it sometimes doesn't matter, you can really believe that no matter how bad you think you have it, someone else has it worse than you.

On the philosophical side, remember that you only live once and it is pretty pointless to spend those precious minutes worried about your problems.

I sound like I am preaching but even I have not found a way to keep this thought primary in my own head, occasionally they can help with stressful situations though.

Hope that helps. You are not alone, I am stressed too and so is everyone on this planet. Just don't give it too much energy.
-Ryan
 
a. thanks guys....

Ryan
"On the philosophical side, remember that you only live once and it is pretty pointless to spend those precious minutes worried about your problems."

I am in no way this type of person at all. I preach this as much as I can think.
Also, I'm not normally stressed out... I'm pretty laid back.

Workout Routine....
Not so much in the last 6 months... The previous two years I did "Body for Life" and really enjoyed it a great deal.

But it is pretty hard to live completely and keep up that Body for life, lifestyle all of the time.
 
Exercise, sleep, and drink plenty of water. If you are stuck behind a computer then move around every hour or so.
 
I'm just wondering if these are a lot of things in this time period, and would it be "normal" to be stressed out in this type of situation?
 
-Shoot guns
-bowl
-punch a punching bag
-run until exhaustion
-talk about your problems to someone who will listen (and eventually you'll have a better perspective of how everything is going be all good)
-see a movie
-start a new "project" like remodeling something in your house or landscaping outside
-listen to Metallica's "And Justice for All"
-hit golf balls
-hit balls at a batting cage
 
Rip,

I don't think there is anything unusual about you being stressed right now. As you have stated, you have a lot going on.

I'm not saying that exercise will cure all of your stress and allow you a good nights's sleep every night, but it certainly won't hurt and it could easilty help. You don't have to go back to the Body for Life model. That is a tough program to keep up. But doing some intense cardio a couple of times a week with at least some strength training is a good compromise. Put it on your calendar like a work appt. and do it. See if you feel better in a month....I think you will.

Best of luck.
 
Eastern, thanks....

You know at work it's the stress of "everyone wanting something from me." and it never stops...
and instead of running after work i've been hittin' happy hours...

Ryan - what I mean is that I practice the "you only live once" thing... normally...

Myke...
I would love to fish.
Only thing is I'm one of those conservatives that can't find it in me to kill animals....


wink.gif
 
i don't think it sounds like stress that's getting at you..more like anxiety. Take this weekend to let your SO know that you need some down time. Go to a park and soak up the sun with each other. Go see a funny movie (i suggest Forgetting Sarah Marshall). Start exercising, staying hydrated, taking vitamins, blah blah blah.

Sounds to me like you've got it pretty good right now. Instead of wondering what may be wrong in your life, try to focus on what all you've got going right for you.
 
as far as child due...i just had my 2nd three weeks ago and they are 19 months apart so trust me i know what you're going to through. i just want to say that you are going to be nervous about bringing a child to the world but don't let that ruin you. i go by the theory that far less capable people than you and me have raised children.

as far as stress remedies, my suggestion is that you take a Sat or Sun to do something by yourself. you will never have this time again when the kid comes (sort of) so i encourage you to just sit and think about stuff like the kind of parent you want to be and what kind of great things you'd like to teach your kid.
 
Have you read Covey's book, "Seven Habits of Highly Successful People"? I know it sounds silly, but when I get overly stressed and overwhelmed, I refer back to it and it always seems to help me refocus. Good luck, man, hang in there and seek professional help if you need to .
 
No i haven't but I'll definitely try it...

It's just weird, I don't even feel like myself. At least not for the past month or so.
 
Rip, I feel for you. I'm pretty ****** professionally right now, so my advice isn't worth ****.

But if I didn't have my kids and boxing right now, I'd be a madman.
 
Rip,

I don't know how much I offer is worth a ****, but I can certainly commiserate while putting on a strong face. I've thought, at times, that there is no way more change can pile on me once than *now*. Now was obviously that point in time. Any point in time. I was wrong. More change seems to be my M.O., and I've found it best to keep moving.

I was in tech sales for years and excelled, made my way into software sales and thought I was going to make a career out of that. Had a great run there but also saw that it is not where I need to be right now. I'm about to be 28, changing careers completely, got a contract on my house today (to sell), have no job for the next month, my new job will require me to be in Houston from 7am Monday to 4pm Friday, my girlfriend of 5 years is still in Austin at a great job, and I have no idea how anything will look 6 months down the road except we will be together and it will be good because that's the way it should be.

I know that sounds like unfounded optimism but I've found, as I hope you have, that I've traditionally made the right decision, even when it has been hard, and the results have been what I expected.

As shallow as it may be, I have to agree with MrMyke here (especially knowing you went to/grew up around Webster Bikes & the coast in general) - go fishing. If you can't stand killing animals, go 100% catch and release. But there is nothing better than clearing your mind in the surf down in Galveston, jumping over waves to make it to the second sandbar at daybreak with your closest buddy being 30 yards away and a cooler on the beach that you can waste the afternoon on.

That, in my experience, has been one of the few times that I've been able to actually collect clear thoughts and be remotely introspective.

I'm done with the cheeseball rant, but give it a shot. I've found that truly giving myself a few hours to think has been the best idea I've had when I'm clouded with ideas.

Best of luck to you on figuring this pressure out.
 
Stress is a product of our mind, not a 'thing' or condition that exists in life. Took me a while to really get that, but when you do it helps to understand that we do it to ourselves, and so we can undo it. The feeling of stress is just a result of how we interpret things and the meanings we give them, and our imaginations can take the simplest of situations and turn them into big-scary-oh-**** kinds of problems. Very few things are really worthy of this kind of thinking.

As mentioned already, and it cannot be overstated: exercise is key. You said you replaced exercise with happy hour, if so stop that now. I have found that a regular cardio workout (for me, running) helps tremendously. Make time for it and it will reward you.

You have gone through trying circumstances before in life, probably many times over, and what happened: you made it. Right? Probably came through pretty damn well, actually. And you will continue to do that, so relax and trust yourself to handle everything else that comes along. Let go.

Someone once that said that if we lost our capacity for imagination then 90% of our problems would go away.
 
All I can add is to believe in yourself (along with the exercise and prayer/meditation advice) Thanks for starting this thread. Lots of us have the same issue and its nice to hear others say "its gonna be OK"
 
Just to add a little that I haven't mentioned yet...
and if this could be possible.
Allergies/Asthma

When I was a little kid say from 4-7 years old, i had asthma pretty bad.
And I've always been allergic to cats...

Haven't really had any asthma symptoms other than sometimes when I run.

Fast forward to now. Never have I been allergic to my dog. Lately he's had some allergy problems related to fleas. He get's one flea on him and it's itch city.

So what I'm wondering is with him scratching like he has been (we've tried everything), can he be throwing dander in the air that I'm becoming allergic too?

Because what's scaring me (and maybe bringing on anxiety), is that when I do wake up in the middle of the night, I actually wheeze a little bit.
 
As someone with pet allergies (but still has dogs), I can relate. It would seem to me that if your middle of the night wheezing was from the dog that you would have similar symptoms at other times. You wouldn't be allergic just at night. On the other hand, if the dog sleeps in your bed, maybe your allergy is so slight that it takes that amount of time to cause a problem. Who knows? You could try taking benadryl before going to sleep and see if that stops the problem.
 
Well it was sort of this "waking up at night" thing that kicked all of this off in the first place.

And of course my brain goes straight to "Congestive Heart Failure."

And by the way thanks for all the advice...

Capt.Ed, I did get on the Hutch and ride around for awhile last night.
 
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