My Wife is Leaving Me ...

[Barton Hills]

Yep.
She broke the news to me gently though. I respect her for that.

She was somehow selected as the ONLY elementary teacher in the country to accompany world renowned Geology professors and scientist to Ant F'n Arctica for a 5 week geological expedition.

Dates are April-mid May. Always had the thought she may leave me, but for some younger model of myself ... not some penguins and underwater rock formations.

I handled the news by starting a list of activities to keep me occupied during my 34 day hiatus from marriage.

Feel free to toss out suggestions ... I'll start.

#1 - Texas Baseball ...

 

[NCAAFBALLROX]

# 2. Beer.

# 3. Q.

# 4. Fishing.

 

[Steel Shank]

That's cold-blooded.

 

[TxStHorn]

Women.

That's what you get for trusting them.

 

[Barton Hills]

[billy madison voice]"I see what's going on here ..."[/billy madison voice]

 

[flaco]

5. Stock up on lotion.

 

[wildcat09]

5. Hookers

 

[uisge beatha]

You've already got #1 down. Anything else is just secondary.

 

[RoundRobin]

My dad and my oldest brother (and maybe my other brother) have been to every continent but Antarctica. I always thought it would be cool to have visited all of them.

RR

 

[hullabelew]

Barton, are any of these folks from UAB? Is she going to Palmer Station?

 

[capitalcity]

It's a risky business, but I think opening a brothel is a good idea.

 

[GatorDave]

6. ?

7. Profit!

 

[Statalyzer]

My advice is to start drinking heavily.

 

[El_Oso]

8. start exchanging all your cash in to $1 bills.

 

[Praise of Folly]

Is she coming back?

If so, 34 days isn't that big of a deal. Otherwise, if she wants to play with penguins for the rest of her life you're probably better off without her.

 

[kangsta]

beer and porn

 

[HornGrandioso]

For every decision you must make, ask yourself: What Would Homer Do?

 

[Sangre Naranjada]

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[NCAAFBALLROX]

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[CleverNickname]

Get her this to read:
The Link

 

[LITNIN HORN]

looks like there are about 20-25 UT baseball games during that stretch...hit all of the road games, and with travel days you won't have any spare time.

 

[scottsins]

PoF, did you actually read the OP?

 

[Macanudo]

Call in sick EVERY DAY she's gone.

 

[MadTrapper]

I might be worried if I were you, because as we all know...geologists make the bedrock.

 

[Praise of Folly]

Scottsins,

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[SA_Town_Horn]

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[Barton Hills]

MadTrapper takes the lead ...

 

[El Sapo]

Build and enormous pillow fort in the living room, drag a full ice chest inside, and live there for a month.

 

[Statalyzer]

PoF....

 

[WhoooTex]

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