My father has dementia and gets lost...

S

Scooter

250+ Posts
My dad is 73 and has dementia. He still drives to the few places he can remember. My step-mother is worried he will get lost and just drive who-knows-where.

Is there a gadget we could put it his truck so we can find him if he ever gets lost? I found this in a web search but I don't know anything about these products:

Zoombak at Radio Shack
 
After memory, spatial analysis and problem solving, like getting lost while driving, is usually the first noticeable cognitive impairment in Alzheimer's like dementia. You need to decide how to limit his driving for his own safety. Unfortunately, another loss can be the awareness of deficits or sometimes the memory of the awareness of deficits. He may realize after he gets lost that maybe he shouldn't drive alone any more, but tomorrow or two hours from now he may not remember that. It's tough to start limiting someone's freedom if they have been independent all of their life, but it comes to be a safety issue at some point.
 
Lojack SafetyNet:The Link

Don't know anything about it, just found it by searching.

edit: I see they actually put that on the person. If you don't want to go that far, the regular LoJack system might work.
 
I had never heard of the Zoombak until yesterday. The local (Dallas) news had a story about a guy that had his motorcycle stolen and he was able to go online and pinpoint where it was located "within a matter of a few feet".

I don't know if that is what you should use, but you will probably want to get something along those lines for the duration. Your Dad will be a little safer and you will have a little peace of mind.
 
About 1/3 of the ZoomBak reviews on Amazon are 1 star.

The Link

One problem seems to be the battery life is only 5 days.
 
The hard truth is that it may be time to tell dad he just can't drive anymore. If he gets lost, he might panic and then end up in a very dangerous situation.

You also might want to think about getting help-lines in the house. Shortly after my granny, (years ago) go to the point that she had to quite driving, she woke up from a nap and couldn't find my aunt who was taking care of her, panicked, and ended up w/ a neighbor who called APS and our family ended up being investigated-- it was a mess and totally unnecessary, but it happens. If your step mom doens't already have a cell, she should get one. Post the number really big in places that a panicking person might look-- like on the door, fridge, and by the phone-- they won't think about it unless they see it.
 
I believe there are fairly inexpensive GPS devices to put in vehicles that will locate them. The taxi companies use them in Austin. I don't know who sells them, but I have heard they were cheap enough for used car dealers to consider putting them in cars they sell on notes, so this may be what you need.
However, a person driving like that may be a hazard not only to himself, but to others, and you are going to have to make a difficult decision about taking the keys. I don't envy you in this matter.
My stepfather had to go in a nursing home one month before he passed away, as my mother could not physically move him to a wheel chair and he fell several times. There were people in there with mental deficiencies, and physical problems, and some with both. It was heartbreaking to see.
My mom faced the issue of my stepfather driving as he got older (he was 95 when he passed away recently), and he got where he only drove to church once a week, with her in the car. One time he backed the car out of the parking spot and went back inside and left the car there.
So this gets scary, and is very hard to deal with. If the person is living alone, it falls on the closest relative, which may be you, to make the hard decisions about taking the car keys.
 
When is your dad's TDL up for renewal? It may be the opinion of the DPS trooper wuy rides out wit him that your dad should not be driving.

If a person is not 100 percent competent, he or she should not be behind the wheel of a car. It's as simple as that, and someone who has dementia is not 100 percent. As someone pointed out above, he might panic behind the wheel and kill someone.

When I was the district aide to a member of the Texas House, we had a constituent who called us, all upset because the DPS had refused to renew his father's license. This old man in question was about 86 years old and had dementia. When he went to take the driving test for his renewal, the trooper realized that this fellow wasn't competent to be behind the wheel of a deadly weapon, which -- in effect -- a car is. He turned right when he was told to turn left, he ran red lights, and couldn't remember how to get back to the DPS station. The old man was upset, naturally, because he was facing the loss of independence, and the son was bound and determined that his father was not going to be "put on the shelf" (his words).

I talked to the trooper at length, who told me, "Texanne, I was literally scared to death to be in the car with him. He had no idea what he was doing or where he was going. I've driven with thousands of teen drivers, and none of them scared me like that old man did."

The state rep told me to get the license back anyway, despite the trooper's report. He suggested restrictions so that the old guy could just drive to the grocery store and pharmacy. (The state rep didn't want to lose votes!) I pointed out to my boss that if the old man caused an accident and killed or maimed somebody, it would surely come out that the DPS had tried to deny his renewal, but that the state representative had fought for it. "And who do you think the victim's family and the public will blame?" I asked him.

He finally saw the light, and we had to tell the son that we agreed that the old man should not be driving. (Later on, it cost me a job at a bank where the son was a VP, but it was worth it. I could not have lived with myself if that old man had killed somebody.)

I think it might, indeed, be time for your dad to stop driving. His safety and the safety of the public is worth more than his sense of independence. We all grow old, and that's just a fact of life.
 
My buddy had a GPS tracking system placed on his car (that his wife drove) to confirm she was having and affair. In his case you had to replace the batteries fairly often, a hardwired system would be better. He bought it from a "spy shop" here in Austin.

It's going to be a safety issue to be certain. Hopefully just for your father.
 
Getting lost is not the only risk for aging drivers with dementia. Reaction times, decision-making, etc. are all affected and are a risk for others on the road as well as the driver. Chances are he shouldn't be driving at all. We just went through this with my MIL and had her doctor tell her she had to stop driving. It worked.
 
The more I think about this and the more I read the responses, it may be time for "the talk". So many times the drivers end up making a wrong turn, end up in a remote area and die from the heat or cold. If the car has a GPS type system, it still might not save him if he gets out and wanders away.

Tough situation and I know I'll be dealing with it with my own parents in a matter of a few years. Thank God my Mom quit driving because of a cataract recently because I was starting to worry about her behind the wheel.
 
Fastball's song "The Way" was inspired by an old couple from Salado that got in the car one morning in July to head to Temple for the annual Pioneer Day celebration, 20 miles away.

They were finally found in ARKANSAS.
 
Have to agree with a lot of what has been said. It's time for the keys to be taken away.

I still vividly remember when my sisters and I had to do that with our mother. She was 59 and had just been "diagnosed" with early-onset Alzheimer. Her doctor had been telling us for a couple of months that we needed to do it. We just didn't want to take her independence away. Until, one of my sisters was riding with her, our mom ran a red light, almost got into a wreck; she didn't even realize what she had done.

The thought of her getting hurt or hurting someone else opened our eyes to reality. It sucked having to do it, but it was necessary.

Good luck with the road ahead for your dad, step-mom and you. Our mom went on to live another 13 years and passed away this past September 6th 2008. It is a vicious disease (as many are that affect your loved ones).
 
My brother-in-law is a police officer in my dad's town. I've asked him to ride with dad and see if he is a danger to anyone. I"ll keep you posted. And thanks for the responses.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

Weekly Prediction Contest

* Predict HORNS-AGGIES *
Sat, Nov 30 • 6:30 PM on ABC

Recent Threads

Prediction Results Threads

2024 Schedules

Back
Top