Jokes about current events

[Ignatius]

During the 1988 presedential race, when Gary Hart was in trouble for ******* around and there was the Joe Biden plagairism scandal, this was a good one:


Abraham Lincoln, Richard Nixon, Gary Hart, and Joe Biden are on a boat in the middle of a lake. They come upon a woman whose boat has capsized, and she's drowning.

Lincoln says "Let's save that woman"

Nixon says "**** that woman"

Gary Hart says "Do you think we can?"

Joe Biden says "Do you think we can?"


Also, when Denver International was opening around '95 or so, they kept having delay after delay over the new baggage handling system; this was also about the time some dude landed a Cessna on the lawn of the White House and got capped by the Secret Service.


What's the difference between Denver International and the White House?

You can land a plane at the White House

 

[txboy_in_az]

This is back when the Cowboys were going through their troubles, and Princess Diana was killed.

What's the difference between Princess Di and the Dallas Cowboys?
The Cowboys wait to get out of the tunnel to die.

 

[Bookman]

From the Challenger:

What color were Christa McAuliffe's eyes?

Blue. One blew this way, one blew the other.

 

[El_Oso]

Lat words heard from the Challenger before exploding?

"What does this button do?"

 

[wolfman]

Donna Rice was the woman who Gary Hart was fooling around with and when the press found out the scandal killed his presidential hopes in the late 80s. She was still pretty well known when the Challenger happened.

What do Donna Rice and Krista McAuliff(sp!) have in common? They both went down on the Challenger.

 

[Myrrhman]

What was the last thing that went through Kurt Cobain's mind?

His teeth.

 

[Myrrhman]

What does JFK JR miss most about flying?

The runway.

 

[Statalyzer]

In reply to:

---

---

 

[kgp]

In the 1996 presidential campaign:
The two candidates were asked what manner of underwear they preferred, boxers or briefs. Clinton said, "boxers." Bob Dole said, "Depends."

I guess this one might be recycled for '08, after a fashion.

 

[GreenDragonSix]

I was in the 3rd grade when the Challenger roasted itself...and somehow we heard this joke. I remember cracking up anytime somone said it

Q. What does "NASA" stand for?

A. Needs Another Seven Astronauts

 

[MilkmanDan]

What were Christa McAuliffe's last words to her husband?

"You feed the kids - I'll feed the fish."

 

[TexonLongIsland]

Have you seen the new governor of New York?

Neither has he

 

[Bookman]

In reply to:

---

---

 

[zosostein]

Joseph Stalin comes to Vladimir Putin in a dream and tells him two pieces of advice:
1) round up all the democrats and kill them
2) paint the inside of the Kremlin blue

Putin replies, "why blue?"
Stalin says, "Ha! I knew you wouldn't ask me about the first part!"

 

[SuperG24]

Why did NASA choose Pepsi to be it's official sponsor?

They couldn't get 7-UP