I have to give a best man speech in a week

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Duff_Man

Guest
Like many of you, I have waited up to the last minute to prepare a speech at my best friend's wedding.

Someone here (or on another forum) posted a template a few years back that served as a guideline for delivering a speech. You basically plugged in key words where appropriate. The idea is to make the speech sincere, thoughtful, with some humor thrown in.

Please HELP my fellow Horn Fans!!!!

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Don’t forget the part about how the bride has changed the groom into a better person.



(Even if she hasn’t.)
 
Drop a bomb. Say you want to nail the bride's sister or have a 3some with the bridesmaids. Best man speeches tend to suck and all sound the same, go with something youtube worthy.
 
I made a best man's speech which consisted primarily of an Irish proverb and lasted about 30 seconds. It doesn't need to be long.
 
I was a best man twice, but having only attended one wedding as a child I wasn't really familiar with any of the duties.

So at the first wedding I was asked to say a few words and did. It was a fairly informal environment and my little off-the-cuff speech went well.

Problem was, I didn't realize this was a tradition. So at the second wedding I was asked to say a few words in a more formal setting and that, uh, didn't go so well.
 
Currently I'm trying to think of the good times we've had to share with the wedding audience, but this is something the bride does not need to know about.

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Talk about how great it has been knowing the guy. Recount one or two touching (or goofy) moments, so long as they are appropriate to share with the crowd. Tell everyone how happy you are that he found the right girl, and that you are looking forward to the bright future they have together. Close with something witty but not obscure enough to confuse the older folks. Give the groom a big man-hug (chest thumps may be substituted if you were frat brothers or long-time drinking buddies, provided that there is at least a 10% distribution of former frat brothers/sorority sisters in the crowd. Backwards caps however are something of a faux pax.)

Sit down and resume your copious indulgence in free drinks and food as you watch bride and groom awkwardly circle the dance floor.

Congratulations! You have just made a Best Man speech!
 
Don't forget the toast. People always forget to actually hoist a glass and conclude with an actual toast. I ALWAYS close with something like, "I wish you every bit of good health, happiness, and prosperity that I've ever hoped and prayed for myself and my family. So here's to [name] and [name]."

Or, you could just conclude with "live long and prosper."
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Say something along the lines of "as great as you are, Bob ... you completely outkicked your coverage with Jennifer. She's beautiful, intelligent, kind hearted and sweet and, well, just WAY too good for you. " Say all of this jokingly and everybody will laugh but in that way they will all understand that you've just expressed how you feel about the bride.
 
AVOID THE F-BOMB

was at a wedding this weekend as a groomsman. at the rehearsal dinner, one of the bridesmaids stood up and started talking. no one was listening until we all heard the f-bomb. twice.
 
Keep it above board. No reference to the stupid **** the groom did before he was tamed by his bride, no stupid frat house references, no references to how cool he used to be, or how many chicks he used to nail. Be short, sincere and make sure above all else to make it a speech to the "couple" not an ode to your friend the groom, etc.
 
If the groom impressed you with something about he said about the bride, you could relate that story. A friend of mine told me he was dating a woman from Louisiana who was a great cook, a school teacher who was very intelligent, good sense of humor (whom he naturally ended up marrying), when previously he described each woman he dated in terms such as "she has bodacious tatas." OK, you might edit that last part a bit. But you get the idea.
 
You need to talk in general about the time you spent with him, relay a funny story (clean and harmless) about the past that sort of "sums up" either the groom or the relationship. Mention the point in thime when you KNEW for the first time that gosh darn it, he's in love, real love with that girl. you can probably remember when it hit you.

Then close with this is the last time I wall ever make this toast to my Buddy, and aske everyone to raise a glass, especially encourage the old people to join you in standing and raising a glass. The say these words with your glass held high- "A toast I will never make to you again Buddy, Here's to Being Single, Seeing Double, and Sleeping Triple!" Then say.. "Now where are the bridesmaids?"
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