Email from tool

[Hornin Hong Kong]

'Do not think he is - but he may have thoughts on potential buyers for this name as he may be seeing flows here, could be a catch 22. Is there a way you can take his thoughts without wallcrossing him as we are still ideating?'

this dude was dead serious.

 

[Art Vandelay]

Good Lord. I'm pretty sure "Wallcrossing" and "ideating" are straight out of the corporate douchebag handbook, chapter one.

 

[DCLonghorn]

I thought you received an email from the band "Tool". Other than that, I have no idea what you're talking about!!

 

[jimmyjazz]

What in the world is "wallcrossing"? Some of our marketing folks get a bit excessive with the corporate lingo, but "wallcrossing" and "ideating" take it to a completely different level.

 

[hornimal]

this guy has high "elaborate proposal" potential

 

[Steel Shank]

Circle back to him with redifinitions of innovation strategies.

(I heard the above just a few minutes ago.)

Or maybe punch him in the junk.

 

[WhoooTex]

Write him back in six point font serial killer style:

im going to kill you

See how he ideates that.

 

[ctrl+alt+del]

BINGO!

 

[MilkmanDan]

In reply to:

---

---

 

[DCA_HORN]

I think something was lost in translation from Honkongenese.

 

[RoughedUpSuspect]

MBA or consultant? I love this stuff.

My buddies in other industries and I pass them around when we hear them like buzzword bingo.

Right now I'm trying to integrate "co-opertition" into the daily jargon. That's right...cooperation + competition = co-opertition.

I was all over "vertical integration" back in the day.

 

[HornGrandioso]

Network Executive: We at the network want a dog with attitude. He's edgy. You've heard the expression "Let's get busy"? Well, this is a dog who gets biz-ay; consistently and thoroughly.
Krusty: So he's proactive?
Executive: Oh, God yes! We're talking about a totally outrageous paradigm.
Writer: Excuse me, but "proactive" and "paradigm"? Aren't those just buzzwords that dumb people use to sound important? Not that I'm accusing you of anything like that... I'm fired aren't I?

 

[bozo_casanova]

By way of amusing himself, a friend of mine introduced "teabag" to his regional marketing team as a term for just, you know, putting an idea out there in a big meeting to sort of infuse it into the discussion taking place, as in: "while we're talking about programs, can I teabag your team about channel spiffs?"

 

[alden]

I've never received an email from any of my tools. But if my nailgun sent me an email, I'd be sure to reply.

 

[Statalyzer]

For us guys, I'd say our nailguns send our brains e-mails quite often.

 

[horngrad03]

Tell him you gotta go. T. Boone Pickins just walked in.

 

[CaptainEd]

In reply to:

---

---

 

[someone]

In reply to:

---

---

 

[Eating Club]

In reply to:

---

---

 

[CaptainEd]

In reply to:

---

---

 

[shotgun427]

Can anybody translate what the **** the dude is saying?

 

[chuychanga]

Send him this:

 

[Beamwalker]

swordcrossing?

I have no idea what any of that stuff meant.

 

[bigup2dahorns]

tell him he is circled for his lunch order